


Love Confessions

by Geekygirl24



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Angst, Canon Disabled Character, Fluff, Force-Sensitive Chirrut Îmwe, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:53:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26561701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geekygirl24/pseuds/Geekygirl24
Summary: For as long as he could remember, Chirrut had seen nothing but darkness.No matter how wide he opened his eyes, or how bright the lights were all around him, there was never a flicker of anything in his vision.
Relationships: Chirrut Îmwe/Baze Malbus
Kudos: 17





	Love Confessions

For as long as he could remember, Chirrut had seen nothing but darkness.

No matter how wide he opened his eyes, or how bright the lights were all around him, there was never a flicker of anything in his vision.

When he was a child, bored in the Temple creche with no-one to play with, he’d wave his hands in front of his face, frowning when the Force didn’t magically fix it. During trips to the Meditation Gardens, he gazed into the water of the fountains and try to imagine what he looked like.

It’s not like he missed having sight… he’d been like this since birth and never known anything else.

As a teenager, he did used to be bitter about it, believing that whilst all the other initiates were being chosen, he was doomed to be sent away, doomed to never become a true Jedi. He’d screamed, sobbed and beaten the walls that he couldn’t see, before retreating to his bed and deciding that there was no point in continuing… he might as well just stay here.

Even when his Master came through for him, arguing that even a blind kid could be one of the best Jedi’s the Order had ever seen, the darkness still weighed heavily on his shoulders.

Most Master/Padawan pairings would play games with one another, testing hand eye coordination by playing ball games, or playful spars… but he and his own Master could never do that, and Chirrut often felt like he’d let his Master down because of this.

His Master would then call him a ‘little fool’ and tug at his braid, before inviting him to play a word game, that required nothing but sound.

He still missed his Master.

Older and wiser now, Chirrut was no longer bitter about what he had to live without, but he knew there would always be a part of him that wished he could see the world like everybody else…. See the stars like everybody else.

See the face that belongs that belongs to the voice he’s fallen in love with.

Baze had come barrelling into his life after Chirrut had taken refuge in the Temple on Jedha, still struggling with his grief at his Masters’ death. He was serious, strong and one of the best warriors of the Guardians (according to multiple sources).

Despite the Jedi Order frowning on attachment, Chirrut felt like he’d found everything in Baze, everything that he never knew that he was searching for. He wasn’t sure when exactly he fell in love with the older man…. But it must have been fairly soon after they met, because he remembered spending several years believing that maybe, if he had all five senses, Baze would love him back.

He never opened his mouth to confess however, never said a word to Baze…. He didn’t think he could survive having his hopes crushed. He was scared of losing the best and worst thing to ever happen to him, no matter how often he tried to expel his fear into the Force.

It was the summer before the Empire ‘took control’ of Jedha.

It was all normal at first. Just another day of joking around with one another, teasing Baze about the noises he’d heard from the other mans’ room the previous night (no matter how much his heart ached because of it)… and then he realised that Baze had gone completely silent.

“Does it hurt?” the other man grunted.

“…. Huh?”

“When I sleep with other people…. Does it hurt you?”

Chirrut knew it would be so easy to just say yes… to confess everything and beg for Baze’s continued friendship. Instead, he replied with “What are you talking about?”

“…. You look like you’re just pretending to be happy for me. Like all this teasing is just one big act.”

Baze knew him so well…. But Chirrut wasn’t ready to admit that just yet.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He muttered, turning away from Baze and choosing to focus on listening to the hustle and bustle of the city down below, the feel of the sand underneath his fingertips.

The panic was quickly rising inside of him.

“Chirrut…” Baze’s voice was gentle, almost like the time after Chirrut’s Master had been murdered by the clones, “… Do you… like me?”

It felt like his heart had stopped in his chest as he curled in on himself, still refusing to look in Baze’s general direction. He doesn’t just like Baze, he’s in love with him… and that’s so much worse.

“Chirrut…” Baze’s voice was barely above a whisper, as he wrapped his arms around the blind boy, ignoring how Chirrut tried to shrink away from him, “… I’m sorry, but It’s okay. I’m not mad, I just… wanted to know for sure.”

Chirrut barely heard him though, focusing on his breathing for a few moments. Twenty seconds passed, before he managed to build up enough courage to answer Baze properly. “Yes.” His voice was so soft, he didn’t believe that Baze could hear him, “I’m in love with you.”

There was an exhale, loud and heavy at his side before Baze was reaching over, gently brushing his fingers against Chirrut’s cheeks, collecting the tears that had gathered there.

“It’s okay.” The older boy whispered, “I love you too.”

Slowly, Chirrut’s hands rose to rest on Baze’s on his cheek, “R-really?”

“Really.”

And then there was a press of lips to his as his heart picked up speed. He could feel Baze’’s smile against his lips, almost picturing how it looked in his mind.

It wasn’t a perfect picture of Baze… but it was a start.


End file.
